Monday, April 8, 2013

Running for Angela

This entry isn't about XYZ. Instead, I've chosen to use this space to write about someone I think about every day but can no longer pick up the phone and call.

Angela and I met in the sixth grade. We had every class except homeroom together. From the moment we met, we became the best of friends. I distinctly remember the first time I spent the night at her house. We had such a blast....and ate way too many cookies and watched way too many Johnny Depp movies.

As the years passed, many friendships I had changed - you know how emotional/dramatic girls can be in those years! But the relationship between the two of us only grew stronger. It helped that we continued to have EVERY class together through the eighth grade. I still have the notebooks we used to pass back and forth to each other in class!

When we hit high school, we no longer had the same class schedule every year, but that didn't change a thing between us. Here's a funny story: In our school, if you earned all As for a quarter, you got what was called a Gold Card. That card let you in to all school sporting events for free. Our sophomore year, Angela and I had biology together. I had earned all As except for biology. I was going to get a B. :( It just so happened that our teacher was the school's trainer and clearly enjoyed all school sports. So Angela wrote him a fabulous letter, begging him to GIVE me an A so that I could get that Gold Card and come support the teams....and watch her cheer. So obviously, he gave me the A....and then I had to attend every single sporting event that quarter, which was totally fine with me because they were pretty fun events.

One of our many sailing adventures
 
 
Anywho - off to college we went...me to USC and Angela to BYU. Though we were thousands of miles apart...and there was no Facebook back then...we remained in constant contact. She was the ONLY person I used this odd thing called "e-mail" with back then. I mean, who in the world thought that would ever catch on!

Ironically enough, it was through email that I learned about Angela's first diagnosis with skin cancer - she explained it all to me in one email. I remember where I was....sitting at my desk as an undergrad assistant in this little closet of an office. It's a good thing it was isolated because I'm pretty sure I was knocked to the floor with fear.

After several surgeries and all kinds of other terrible stuff, Angela was "clean." We no longer hit the beach together on our summer breaks, but we did still find ways to hang out when we ended up in the same place at the same time.

Fast forward to winter 2007. I was in the midst of yet another sad breakup. Angela had just gotten married that December and was living in London with her new husband...and being Angela, she offered to give me however many hundreds of frequent flyer miles I needed in order to come visit her in London to take my mind off things! So off I went. We had a great visit. I remember her explaining how she'd been racking up all these miles....flying back and forth often for dermatologist appointments. She'd been having mole after mole pop up and look suspicious. I remember sitting on the train one afternoon with her, and her telling me she felt like she was being attacked. At the time, I just thought: "what a pain...to have to keep going and getting these little surgeries to have moles removed." If only.....

That was March 2007.

I believe it was later that year, Angela and her husband were back stateside on a more permanent basis for her to be able to deal with more than just moles. The cancer had metastasized and was now in her brain, breast and lungs. Again, I remember where I was when I read the email telling me they were coming back to the states.....at work in the library....and unfortunately in front of a computer with way too much Google time on my hands.

The story doesn't get any better from here, but I was lucky enough to be able to visit Angela during some of her treatments over the next two years. We always had a blast during our visits, and I hated leaving.

Our last visit was Easter Sunday 2009. She was at home, and I came down to visit. I decided to go to her church that morning. It was a difficult service. Angela was not feeling well but put on a brave face. After the service, I hugged her goodbye and told her I loved her. That was the last time we spoke.

Two weeks later, her husband called me with the news. I remember seeing her name come up on my phone's caller ID. I stared at it for a while....kinda scared to click "answer." It was Paul. All he said was, "Allison, she's gone."

I just happened to be getting in my car at that moment. I was going to my friend Julia's house. We had planned on having a girls' night at a new dessert bar in town, and I thank God for that timing. Anyone who knows Julia, knows she's the kinda girlfriend you want/need to be around when times are tough. She'll make you laugh, cry and then laugh again. I don't know what I would have done without her that night.

The next week or so was a blur of drives back and forth to Myrtle Beach, a trip to Utah and a bunch of long nights.

In the weeks that followed, I had so many supportive friends help cheer me up. One good friend wrote me a sweet note saying that she really wanted to do something to honor Angela and could I please help her find something to do. Again, with too much Google time on my hands, I found the Melanoma Research Foundation and a running program that supported them and decided to run the Marine Corps Marathon in memory of Angela. Training for that race was great therapy - I was up at the crack of dawn every Saturday for long runs, and I got to spend that time alone with just my thoughts/memories. Through tons of tears, I'd run and think about Angela.

Our friend JP ran the marathon too, and after the race, we agreed to NEVER run another marathon again. So - this year, I've signed up to run a mere 6.2 kilometers (not quite 4 miles).


This Miles Against Melanoma 6.2K is a race to raise awareness - and funds. My goal is a mere $200, but I am hoping you'll help me surpass that! Click here to donate. I think JP will be running with me again...or as I like to say, he'll be running in front of me.....so if you're in Charlotte, we'd love to see you on the sidelines.

There are so many times/days I think of Angela and wish I could just call her to laugh with her. But I can't. What I can do though is keep her memory alive AND help continue the fight against melanoma.

THANKS for your support.

2 comments:

  1. So proud of you Allison! Thank you for running in memory of Angela! xoxo

    Pat Buckner

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  2. Allison this is a beautiful way to celebrate Angela's Life and support a great cause. I think about Angela often and have such fond memories of our time spent together. I will never forget our Camp Cheerio days and how much fun we always had. Thank you for being an awesome person and bringing awareness to an Awesome cause!

    XOXO

    Blair Sprunger

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